this is me and one of the members that always work with us! :) |
there was a black out for almost the entire day so we had all of our studies by candlelight haha it was great |
Ay nako! Lol I got sick this week AGAIN! Honestly never before in my life have I ever GOTTEN THIS SICK! Lol oh goodness it has frustrated me so much! Not because I'm sick but because we miss so much work! Lol now to be completely honest I would always fake sick days because I very rarely had a REAL ONE lol and now its like I'm paying for all those fake sick days hahaha GRABE talaga!
So because I was sick so much this week I don't really have that much to tell you about the work but I was however able to ponder and really think about the time that I've spent here so far and just .... everything. I know I say this a lot but being a missionary is so rewarding! This fact never changes and remains true NO MATTER WHAT. However this doesn't take away from the fact that fulfilling the responsibilities and duties that every missionary has is challenging. In my first transfer here in the Philippines I felt so lost and confused every day. I remember putting my papers in and being so excited and hopeful and happy at the mere thought of serving a mission! Lol I remember the prep and just the enthusiasm that I had right through to the MTC. You study the scriptures and you do anything you can to prepare yourself for one of the greatest callings you might ever receive as a young adult and you really feel the blessings and rewards even before you serve and that just adds to the excitement of serving! And then you go to the MTC and you get a taste of what the field will be like and that just makes you want it even more. AND THEN you get TO the field, and you just feel lost and inadequate and totally unequipped to be doing what you are doing. This is what happened to me haha. My first transfer here was just .... a constant struggle. I often felt like somehow the Prophet made a mistake when he called me and I often found myself wanting so badly to go home. The most interesting thing about this experience was how much it CHANGED. And how much it TAUGHT ME about so many things I don't even have near enough time to share it all with you! But I will start with the most basic and the most sincere and that is trust :). When I finally learned how to trust Him I realized how many aspects of my life that one simple principle effected my life. If I could add it all up for you right now I think I would be counting forever. The reason I say forever is because when we actually allow Heavenly Father to take the lead in our lives we blessings and rewards that we reap are eternal and I know that there is no end to those blessings. When I was truly in the depths of despair feeling alone and unimportant, and feeling so incredibly inadequate it was at that moment in my mission where I realized WHO I needed to turn to for strength, guidance and direction. When I realized that I actually had to LEAN on Heavenly Father in order for my fears and my trials to be taken away I experience such an exquisite change in my life and my belief in God. It was incredible! Because it was then and only then for the first time in my life did I gain an understanding of the Atonement and all of the blessings and benefits that I can and have received from it. The reality of this blessing in my life has changed .... every thing. It has changed how I serve and WHO I choose to serve every day of my life. I have realized through small and simple things how truly incredible this life can be. I have also realized that even through our most trying days we can STILL feel peace and love from Heavenly Father.
With trust there must always follow faith. Faith and confidence that because we are doing what is right and because we are doing the best we can that Heavenly Father WILL BLESS US. I learned a little bit about this when I was training and it has been so exciting to actually SEE this principle in the lives of others. I can't tell you how amazing and wonderful it is. Seriously the love that you feel from Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ is so REAL! I go through life and I live every day making so many mistakes in how I treat others, how I choose to use my time, or how I choose to be obedient, when I mess up and I experience that guilt and shame and HUMILITY I am comforted. Sometimes when you feel that way you kind forget and you are so caught up in your shame or guilt that you actually become to feel like Heavenly Father would never love or forgive some one like you .... I know with all of my heart that those things aren't true. It goes back to the simple principle of humility and patience. Heavenly Father doesn't require ANY OF US to be perfect, He only requires us to be WORTHY. Imperfect and selfish people is all that Heavenly Father has ever had to work with, and the true miracle that we will see in ourselves and others is how powerful the change He will make in our lives if we simply LET HIM.
I know that this Gospel is true and I know that the Atonement of Jesus Christ truly is infinite. All of God's children are privilege to that sacrifice and the Atonement covers and touches every aspect of our life. I know that missionary work is so important because Heavenly Father truly does want every single child of His to return to Him and the only way that this can happen is if WE SHARE WHAT WE KNOW TO BE TRUE.
I know that God's love is pure and I know that He wants to give us everything that we could every possibly need, all we need to do is trust him and humble ourselves to do what is right.
I love you all!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And I hope you are well!
See you next week!
Sister Fonua
here are pics from an FHE we had this past weekend. it was AWESOME! THERE WERE SO MANY PEOPLE! |
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